A private group is a closed list where all members have equal standing. Members can reach each other directly, send to the whole group, and communicate through focused sublists. No one outside the list can contact the group or receive any email from it. Real addresses are hidden from everyone - members know each other only by pseudonym.
This configuration suits extended families, neighborhood groups, community organizations, volunteer teams, support groups, and activist networks. The mechanics are identical for all of these; the difference is only in how members choose to use their pseudonyms.
1. EMail Parrot Configuration
Create your list. Go to emparrot.com/admin and create a new list. Your list address will be yourlistname@emparrot.com. Choose a list name that reflects the group - family, neighbors, chapter7, whatever is meaningful to your members.
Add members. For each member enter their real email address and a pseudonym. The pseudonym is what the rest of the group will see as the sender name. It can be a real name, a role, or anything that makes sense in context. Members do not see each other’s real addresses.
Leave VPE disabled. The default is closed (VPE off). No change needed here.
Leave direct messaging enabled. The default allows members to send private messages to each other via pseudonym addressing. Change this only if you want all communication to be visible to the whole group.
Sublists (optional). If your group has subsets that sometimes need their own channel - a planning committee, a leadership tier, or a subgroup by interest - create sublists by adding sublist names to the relevant members in the member management tab. Members not in a sublist cannot receive email sent to that sublist address, but any member can send to it unless you prefix the sublist name with ^ to restrict it.
Recommended settings:
- VPE: off (default)
- Direct messaging: on (default)
- Advanced protection: on for groups with sensitive communications, default otherwise
- Strip external content: on (default) - removes tracking pixels from inbound email
2. Your Email Client Setup
No required changes. Members use their existing email client to send and receive normally.
Optional - sorting by list: If you want list email to land in a dedicated folder, create a filter in your email client that matches the sender domain or the list address and moves matching messages to a folder. The exact steps depend on your email client.
Optional - caregiver visibility: If a family member needs oversight of another’s communications (e.g., a parent monitoring a teenager’s group mail), place both on the same sublist. Any email to that sublist address reaches both members. See the Family Protection setup for a detailed treatment of this pattern.
3. Addressing Conventions
Teach your members three addresses:
- Whole group:
yourlistname@emparrot.com- reaches everyone - Direct message:
~pseudonym.yourlistname@emparrot.com- reaches one person privately - Address book:
addressbook.yourlistname@emparrot.com- returns all member pseudonym addresses
Members only need to know the group address to get started. They can request the address book to find direct message addresses when needed.
Encourage members to save the group address in their contacts so it is easy to find. Replies to any group message will automatically go back to the group address, so members do not need to manage that manually.
Settings to Consider
The defaults work well for most private groups. A few settings worth knowing about if your group has specific needs:
Advanced protection screens for sophisticated spoofing and social-engineering patterns beyond what standard filtering catches. Turn this on if your group communicates about sensitive topics - medical issues, legal matters, financial coordination, or anything where a member being deceived by a fake message could cause real harm.
Instant deletion instructs EMail Parrot to purge relayed content from its logs immediately after delivery. Standard practice retains a short window for troubleshooting; instant deletion removes that window in exchange for a stronger privacy guarantee. Useful for activist groups, support groups dealing with sensitive personal disclosures, or any group where message content is particularly sensitive.
Direct messaging off is an option if you want all group communication visible to the whole group. With direct messaging disabled, members can only reach the full list - not individual members privately. Most groups leave this on, but transparency-focused groups (some activist networks, public accountability projects) may prefer the all-visible mode.
Sublists are not strictly a setting but worth mentioning here: any member can send to any sublist by default. If a sublist should be receive-only for most members (a leadership channel, an announcements list), prefix the sublist name with ^ to restrict send access to sublist members only.
Checklist
- List created at emparrot.com
- All members added with pseudonyms
- Sublists created if needed
- Group address shared with all members
- Members told how to request the address book for direct messaging
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